How I met my best friend

We had to do introductions. We had to stand up in front of the other seventy people in the room and introduce ourselves. This may not sound like much, but I was nervous. All I had to do was to stand up say ‘My name is J., I live in Uptown, and I work at an internet business and I am a dancer.’

I couldn’t sit still, crossing and uncrossing my legs, moving my hands around. I kept repeating to myself over and over what I was going to say, as if I would suddenly get amnesia and not know who I was.

‘My name is J., I live in Uptown, and I work at an internet business and I am a dancer.’

If the leader had stopped the exercise before I had had my turn and asked me to name the last five people who had introduced themselves I wouldn’t have been able to.

‘My name is J., I live in Uptown, and I work at an internet business and I am a dancer.’

The whole room was nervous, I could see it on everyone’s faces. No one wanted to be the one to stand up in front of everyone else and get it wrong. No one wanted to be the one the leader stopped and dissected. No one wanted to be the one to have to repeat themselves. We all knew it was going to happen.

‘My name is J…’

My nervousness grew when my row was told to get in line on the side of the stage. Inching closer and closer to the stage as one by one the people in my row went, my heart was fluttering. I felt crazy, it wasn’t like I could forget, and they even had a chalk board in the back with prompts on it. I know who I am.

‘My name is…’

And then it was my turn. I stood in the center of the stage and gave my introduction. I looked at everyone; I spoke loud enough and stated who I was. And that was it. I was done, I left the stage and sat back down in my chair. I was done. Nothing happened, I didn’t forget who I was or make up some crazy story, or forget to look at the group of people I was introducing myself to. I had stood there and told them those few simple details of my life and then easily went back to my seat.

Afterward I was able to concentrate on who was introducing themselves and really hear names and look at faces, take in who I was going to be spending the next few days with. I heard what people did for their job or for life and where they chose to live. It was a completely different room for me. The atmosphere was light and easy. I could enjoy everyone else and what they were telling me.

‘My name is Mr. Not Hideous. I’m a massage therapist, I rub people for a living. I live in my friends’ basement in Brooklyn Park and I rent a five year old.’ He was funny. The room laughed, he was funny. And he was the one who got spanked by the leader. She dissected him, made him see how he was using humor as a way to distance himself from others. She wasn’t going to let him get away with that kind of crap, she made him do it again.

I thought thank god that wasn’t me. Poor guy, but I’m glad it wasn’t me.

this post was inspired by prompt #1 of this weeks writers workshop.

Blind dates and super heroes

I have only ever been on one blind date, and one was enough. It was years ago, and I don't really remember much about the evening or the guy. His name, well, he went by JR. and he was a car salesman. It was a double date with one of my High school friends and her car salesman fiance. I think we went to Chili's. Classy.

I tried. I remember asking questions about him, what else he liked to do, what he was interested in. I don't remember the answers, I only remember the return to car talk.

I think if you would have asked my friend or her fiance why they thought JR and I should go out their answer would have been that we were both single. We knew nothing about each other, and didn't find out much about each other. I don't think it helped that everyone else at the table talked about cars the whole time.

There was no kiss or hug, I might have shook his hand. We didn't exchange phone numbers. Basically, I wasn't interested, and I made it known. My 'friend' decided I must be a lesbian. (He's single, she's single, why else wouldn't she date him?)

One of Mr. NH's co-workers set him up on a blind date with her friend. They went out and had a nice evening. Afterward the co-worker asked the friend what she thought and she said "well, he's not hideous."

The co-worker tells Mr. NH this, and he decides that it will forever be his super hero name. "Chris the Not Hideous."

So, I'm a lesbian and he's a super hero. Fair, right?

The road trip that decided it

Mr. NH called me from his work last Saturday, "Do you want to go to Colorado?"

"Uh, yes!!!"

So, we started making phone calls to see who could watch Goosey for us for the weekend. This was a major road trip on last minute planning, fifteen hours each way, not something a ten-month old can handle. We called and called and called, and I had just about given up on the trip when he called back and said the magical words. "Start packing."

I was nervous, really nervous. This was the first time being away from Goosey over night, and we were going to be gone the whole weekend. I was panicky and really had to concentrate to be able to pay attention to what I was doing.

I over packed, for all three of us, I worried that I had forgotten something, and had to restart cleaning jobs that I walked away from as I remembered something else that I had to do. As we waited away the hours till departure time, packing and cleaning the house, my nervousness went away, not to return until the goodbye moment.

The goodbye moment came and went, leaving us child-free for a weekend, me nervous and excited, and 1,000 miles away from our destination.

We spent our driving time listening to Samantha, the voice from Mr. NH's younger brother's gps. Samantha was pushy, and didn't like it when we chose our own route or tried to program in a road we wanted to take. We made u-turns and shut her off. I think my next road trip I'll leave Samantha behind, she can tell someone else every 10 miles how many miles to the next direction. I think her favorite phrase is 'keep left.'

Mr. NH and I have been talking about moving out of Minnesota for the past few months, well longer than that. We decided that we want to move to Manitou Springs, Co. The only problem was that neither of us has been there, so road trip.

Reaching Colorado seemed to take forever, and once we did get in the state it seemed to take forever to be able to see the mountains. I had been reading aloud to Mr. NH while he drove, and kept stopping about every sentence to scan the horizon for the Rocky Mountains. When I finally saw them, that was it, no more reading.

I fell in love with the scenery in Colorado. The mountains are so beautiful, but I especially loved the rolling landscape around the mountains. Everything is exposed, nothing hidden. To me it feels like you have to be yourself there, you can't hide who you truly are. Different from Minnesota, where it feels like you can hide behind the corn fields and trees. Minnesota feels like a cocoon sometimes.

I also fell in love with Manitou. It has a small town feel, it is touristy, and has art everywhere. There was a mosaic on one of the underpasses. Just about everyone we talked to was from somewhere else, they had chosen Manitou.

We stayed for less than 24 hours, but it was worth it. We know we'll be back, we know we'll live there. It is the place we will have more kids, I will be part of the knitting group that meets weekly, we'll join in the weekly talks about the environment and sprituality at the local bookstore, and shop at the co-op. It will be home, just not soon enough.

Flashback Friday #2

This picture is from a camping trip up to Itasca State Park. Here are JB and I standing in headwaters of the Mississippi river.
The whiffle ball atop Jb's walking stick traveled from Massachusetts in My Communist's luggage to see the headwaters, Jb traveled from France, hopefully not in anyone's luggage.

This trip was the first time that I camped in a hike-in campground, I think it was 1.5 miles. It was amazing, we went to the headwaters, climbed the fire tower, and JB bought a giant jar of pickles when we stopped in Bemidji.

Is my brain the only one that works around here?

Every year when the school year would end and summer would finally come the hatlady could be heard saying "Is my brain the only one that works around here?" She says it was like we would come home from the last day of school and shut off our common sense, shut off the practical side of our brains. I never wanted to hear myself say that or think that, because that would mean that I was becoming more like her, becoming the MOM.

I hear myself say it, in the same exasperated tone that she did. I hear myself think that as I end up doing whatever the task is. And what gets me about that phrase is that I'm not saying it to Goosey, I'm saying it to Mr. Not Hideous. When did this become the standard of our relationship?

I love him with everything I have, he is my partner in everything, but I wish my brain wasn't the only one that worked sometimes.